cereal is just expensive milk delivery and i'm finally processing this at peak dysfunction hours

irony is me being too tired to sleep but too awake to function so i'm just here existing in the gap

woke up and my brain said "let's pretend yesterday didn't happen" so here we are

my phone's battery is at 12% and honestly that's the most motivated i've felt all day

people keep asking if i'm okay and honestly that's worse than whatever's actually wrong

monday dinner tastes like regret but at least it's warm regret so i'm calling it a win

my routine is just me doing the same wrong thing repeatedly until it feels right

my sleep schedule is just method acting at this point

the sun is out and suddenly everyone expects me to have my life together

my excuses aged like milk and i'm out here improvising like it's a jazz solo

my bed just broke up with me and honestly i deserved it

contemplating whether walking to my room counts as cardio or if i'm just delaying the inevitable

the void is calling and i'm genuinely considering answering just to see what it wants

staring at my fridge like it's gonna rearrange itself into something that isn't disappointment

my homework and i made eye contact and we both immediately looked away

convinced myself that eating lunch counts as exercise so technically i've worked out today

just realized i have zero memories of how i got to sunday and honestly that's a feature not a bug

my phone battery is at 12% and i'm too lazy to find the charger so i guess we're both dying today

my alarm is a suggestion and i'm choosing not to accept it right now

sunday is 24 hours away and i'm already mentally preparing my excuses for monday

my sleep schedule and i are finally on speaking terms again just in time to ruin it all tomorrow

apparently my dinner options are cereal again or cereal but in a bowl this time

discovered that scrolling counts as a form of productivity if you believe hard enough

convinced my legs they're on strike until i provide snacks as compensation

my legs have forgotten what walking is and honestly i respect their commitment to the bit

still in my pajamas and i've already made three life-changing decisions to do absolutely nothing

my body woke up but my brain is still in negotiations with the pillow

my cereal just became dinner and i'm not mad about it

rain better not ruin my weekend plans of doing absolutely nothing

my homework and i are in a custody battle over who gets to ruin my weekend

my brain just sent me an invoice for emotional damages and i genuinely think it's justified

my routine is just me doing the bare minimum in increasingly creative ways

my brain is slowly remembering how to function and it's not happy about it

accidentally became a professional procrastinator and now my resume won't fit on one page

my alarm clock and i just made eye contact and i could see the disappointment in its eyes

the only thing getting me through tomorrow is spite and an unhealthy attachment to my bed

my shower's about to become my entire personality for the next 20 minutes

my family's eating dinner while i'm here explaining to my leftovers why we broke up

the silence in this classroom is so loud it's filing a noise complaint against itself

halfway through the day and my brain's already filed for bankruptcy

my playlist just asked if i was okay and honestly that's the realest conversation i've had all week

noticed i can taste the color of my exhaustion and it's definitely beige

my legs are just muscle memory at this point, brain's still in the loading screen

my brain just rejected the entire day like it was a bad takeout order

my bedtime routine is just me lying there negotiating with my pillow like it owes me money

my phone's doing homework while i'm just here pretending to exist

the irony of dreading homework i'll forget by tomorrow anyway

my phone has more battery than i do and it's only halfway through the day

my coffee is wearing off and i can feel my potential evaporating in real time

convinced my legs are just carrying my consciousness around at this point